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What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 3rd, 2020, 12:20 am
by ChiefExecutive
Someone was recently rude to me out of nowhere. I'm not sure whether it's best to speak up or to let it slide since he is obviously nebach a little off if he felt the need to speak that way.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 3rd, 2020, 12:56 am
by gamanit
Usually best to let it slide. Sometimes a person feels the need to knock others in order to "raise" themselves higher. Of course they acheive nothing except in their own head but sometimes they need it. If it was in public, remember that anyone insulted in public that doesn't answer has a tremendous koach hatefillah at that moment.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 3rd, 2020, 1:01 am
by Cranberry
Still, sometimes it needs to be called out or else the person will do the same in every single interaction for the rest of his life.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 3rd, 2020, 1:14 am
by ChiefExecutive
I didn't mention this originally, but the person in question used language that is not used in polite society.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 3rd, 2020, 8:06 am
by gamanit
The question is if telling off would help. If this happens again you can try saying "it's possible that I'm xyz but kindly say so using appropriate language". Added bonus is that bullies hate when you agree with them and usually leave you alone after that.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 4th, 2020, 11:22 am
by LunchBreaker
There's a saying, "Be nice to your enemies. It will drive them crazy.".

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 9th, 2020, 12:15 am
by Arc
LunchBreaker wrote: August 4th, 2020, 11:22 am There's a saying, "Be nice to your enemies. It will drive them crazy.".
Yes, but you have to be super-nice, so nice that they ask themselves "with enemies like this, who needs friends?" and ultimately decide that they're not getting what they want out of the relationship, so they choose to end it.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 10th, 2020, 12:46 am
by Cranberry
It also really does depend whether you yourself have the ability to decide not to spend time with this person.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 10th, 2020, 10:17 pm
by shpritz
Silence is golden. Unless the person is a bully and you need authorities involved, it is always better to take the high road.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 18th, 2020, 9:59 am
by LunchBreaker
How do you define a bully? Some people are not quite bullies, but they would be if they had the power.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 20th, 2020, 11:18 am
by shpritz
If someone beats up on others on a consistent basis, I would define them as a bully.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: August 20th, 2020, 11:20 am
by LunchBreaker
But what if someone doesn't physically beat anyone up, but is constantly verbally harassing people?

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: September 6th, 2020, 1:03 am
by ChiefExecutive
Of course he's a bully he disobeys Onuos Devurim.

Re: What do you say to someone who is rude for no reason?

Posted: September 6th, 2020, 10:31 pm
by Arc
ChiefExecutive wrote: September 6th, 2020, 1:03 am Of course he's a bully he disobeys Onuos Devurim.
Is that the definition of a bully? I'm not sure it is accurate.